Columbus Day Excerpts:  Morning [Zephyr sits at the kitchen table, pop tarts and coffee spread out over the morning paper.  Without taking his eyes off the fine print, he dunks the pastry in the mug before eating it, not bothering to look up as Kribensis enters the kitchen dressed in full pirate regalia.] Zephyr: Morning. Kribensis: Argh, matey, ‘tis a fine morn, indeed. [The younger Selestarri continues to read and eat, completely absorbed in his breakfast.  Kribensis slides into the opposite chair, snatching a piece of pop tart as the mechanical parrot perched on his shoulder cackles.] Kribensis: [singing] Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.  Row, row— Zephyr: What the hell are you singing? [Looks up] And wearing? Kribensis: [adjusts the bandana covering his silvery locks] It’s Columbus Day. Zephyr: [grins and stifles a laugh behind a mouthful of strawberry pastry] And? Kribensis: [narrows his eyes] Obviously I’m celebrating. Zephyr: [raises an eyebrow] Halloween or Pastafarian?  For one you’re too early, the other, too late. Kribensis: What are you talking about? Zephyr:  Columbus wasn’t a pirate. Kribensis: Of course he was.  Sea voyages, sailing ships, conquest, and islands full of booty?  Smells like pirate to me.  Zephyr:  [leans back in his chair] I feel like real pirates would have truly stunk, for one.  Bad hygiene and whatnot.  Second, he didn’t actually keep anything he found for himself, he gave it all to the Spanish crown, who financed his travels.  Not very pirate-like.  Third, that outfit you’re wearing is just the romanticized version of pirates, and Columbus wore nothing like it, or talked like that. [The Half-Dark thinks it over for a long moment, scowling.]  Kribensis: So, no pirates?  I’ve been mislead by the Wiki? Zephyr: [nods] Sorry. Kribensis: [stands up and heads for the door, grumbling under his breath] Even when I try to learn about these stupid holidays, everything is wrong… [Zephyr laughs and shakes his head before turning a page in the newspaper.] ~o~o~ [Kribensis climbs up the steps from the subway terminal, threading his way through the busy crowd before turning toward the glass and steel construct of the West Central Savings Bank.  He tugs on the door, but it doesn’t budge.  Pushing wind-blown hair from his eyes, he catches sight of the small sign taped to the plate glass.  ‘Closed for Columbus Day.’] Kribensis:  [frowns] You’re kidding me… [Stuffing the bank papers back into his bag, he turns away and continues down the street.  A large brick and granite building looms on the other side of the street and he crosses with the other pedestrians, stopping short as he reaches for the door handle.  ‘Closed in observance of Columbus Day.’] Kribensis:  What the fuck!  [Glares as people stop to stare at his outburst]  No one fucking asked you, so move along! [Fuming, he stalks back up the street and into the subway once again.] Kribensis:  Why is there no work on this day if you can’t do anything? ~o~o~ Excerpts: Afternoon [Noah and Aki sit on the couch in the living room, watching an episode of America’s Next Top Model.  Several opened cartons of Chinese takeout litter the coffee table and surrounding cushions.] Aki:  [scoops vegetables from the carton with his chopsticks] Why are we watching this again? Noah: [chews on a mouthful of fried rice] Hot girls and all the crazy bitch antics of Tyra Banks. Aki:  They don’t sing or anything, right? Noah: [laughs] No, it’s not American Idol.  This one just has a lot catty girls in virtually no clothing. Aki: Sweet. [Kribensis slams the outside door and storms across the living room, headed for the hallways when he suddenly stops and whips around, staring at Noah and Aki.] Kribensis: What the hell are you eating?! Aki: [looks down at the container of moo goo gai pan]  Um…lunch? Kribensis:  [outraged] Chinese food?!  On Columbus Day?! Noah: [confused] Yes… Kribensis:  Don’t you know that Italian-Americans first observed Columbus Day?  It’s a dishonor to those brave pioneers to eat anything other than pasta and marinara on this day!  [He angrily stacks up the containers, yanking them away from Noah and Aki before stomping off toward the kitchen.]  Considering I’m an Emperor, it seems like some days I have to do everything around here!  I’ll make you the proper celebratory food! [Noah and Aki look at each other, and shrug.] Aki: Whatever. Noah:  Eh, food is food. [They turn their attention back to the T.V.] ~o~o~ [Kribensis lays sprawled out on the huge bed in the room he shares with Stoer and Lochs.  He’s splattered with marinara, red stains on his shirt, pants, and even his hair.  Kicking off his boots, he sighs into the empty room.  A moment later, the door is thrown open and the twins enter, chattering excitedly.] Stoer: Meister!  We’ve been looking all over for you! Lochs:  It’s time for us to help you learn about Columbus Day. Stoer:  We wrote a play that will explain everything. Kribensis: [cracks open one eye and glares at the models] What the hell are you wearing? [Stoer and Lochs are dressed as fifteenth century nobles, replete with lace, frills, and powdered wigs.] Lochs:  It’s part of the play.  I’m King Ferdinand. [His eyes rake over his twin] And Stoer is the smoking hot Queen Isabella. Kribensis: [closes his eyes and turns away] I already know all about Columbus Day.  He wasn’t a pirate, they close the only places you need to visit, there are no songs or candy, and everyone is supposed to eat Italian food.  [He waves dismissively.]  Now go somewhere else… Stoer:  Are you sure you don’t want to see our play, Meister?  [Kribensis nods.]  It’s a shame to waste these costumes. [He pats the white, curly wig.] Lochs:  [grabs his twin’s wrist and pulls the orange-haired German close] Oh, we’re not wasting anything. Stoer: [groans as Lochs yanks the multi-layered skirt to his waist, hands reaching around to grasp his rear.]  Show me the New World, my King? [Lochs grunts in reply and pushes Stoer over the footboard and onto the mattress beside Kribensis.  The bed creaks as the younger twin thrashes in ecstasy, his brother’s head buried beneath the lacy petticoats.  With a sigh, the Half-Dark slides off the silken linens and stalks out the door, slamming it behind him.] ~o~o~ Sashi:  Panties in a wad? [Kribensis spins around in mid-stride, glaring at the Dark.  Sashi’s sitting in the hallway’s large bay window, reading a book in the fading light of the setting sun.] Kribensis:  [scowls] This is a stupid holiday! Sashi:  [sets the book in his lap] Why, because there’s no sex?  Not every holiday has been licensed to the porn industry…yet. Kribensis:  [angrily] Well why not?  All the other days off are!  [Sashi looks puzzled]  There was mud volleyball followed by Springsrite at Easter, fireworks at Independence Day, and Ancelin’s dominatrix job at Labor Day.  Everything seems to involve sex! Sashi:  And you’re complaining because this one doesn’t?  It sounds like your twins are enjoying themselves, so why not join them? Stoer:  [from down the hall] Ah!  Bruder, härter! [Kribensis stands still, listening for a moment as the Germans continue.  Suddenly calmed, he reaches out and pushes the book from Sashi’s lap, straddling the Dark’s hips.] Kribensis:  Almost forgot about Memorial Day.  I’m still not sure if you’re a better fuck alive, or as a corpse.  [He grins wickedly]  Maybe we should find out… Sashi: [laughs and pushes the Half-Dark off the window seat] Not on your best day. Kribensis:  [frowns] Your loss.  [Continues down the hall]  Fucking holiday, first no sex, then sex, then no sex…  [Kribensis grabs a pillow from the end of the bay window and lobs it at the Rabbit, who’s sleeping under a grouping of tall, indoor plants.] The Rabbit:  What the hell!  I didn’t do anything! Kribensis:  That’s the problem! ~o~o~ Excerpts: Evening: [Ikkairius, Ancelin, and Kallixstus are seated in the Ancient Bright’s den, warmed by the large fireplace and half-empty snifter of brandy.  Ancelin reclines on the leather couch, filing her nails, while her brother and Ikkairius play go at the small table near the fire.  Kribensis throws the door open and storms inside.] Ancelin:  [glances up from her lacquered nails] Are you all right? Kribensis:  I looked up all this stuff about this supposed holiday and nothing was right!  It’s just dumb and a waste of time! [The two Half-Dark and the Bright exchange a look before Ancelin puts down the file and gestures for the sulking Kribensis to join her on the couch.  He settles between her legs, head cushioned on her chest, and closes his eyes.] Ancelin:  Not every holiday is fun and exciting, or even interesting, Kribensis.  Sometimes it’s just a chance to relax.  [She strokes his hair and takes the sippy cup that Ikkairius offers.]  Kribensis:  [drinks the brandy-infused Juicy Juice] This boring shit doesn’t sound like you guys at all… [The room falls silent.] Kribensis:  [peers up at his sister through silver bangs] What time? Ancelin: [smiles and licks her lips] Midnight.  The twins are just warming up. Kribensis:  I knew something was off.  Holidays without fucking aren’t real holidays.  [He downs the rest of the brandy and places the cup on the coffee table before snuggling closer to Ancelin.]  Can I wear my pirate costume? Kallixstus:  [stares at his younger brother hungrily, scraping his claws idly against the tabletop.]  For the whole thirty seconds it’ll stay on you, sure. Kribensis: [yawns] Wake me when it’s time… ~o~o~ Excerpts: Late Night [The Fox and the Rabbit sit in the kitchen, an empty plate of brownies and a bottle of wine on the table between the layout of a card game.  From the far corners of the house come the unrestrained sounds of people enjoying one another’s company.] The Rabbit: [shakes her head] I really thought we’d make it through a holiday without sex.  All the way to the last scene before it all went to hell… The Fox:  Well, given what we have to work with, would you expect anything less? The Rabbit:  No, not really.  We haven’t even really hit the major holidays yet, either.  Can you imagine Thanksgiving?  Or Christmas? The Fox:  [giggles] It gives a whole new meaning to ‘stuffing the turkey.’ The Rabbit:  [chokes on a sip of wine] Oh that’s bad! The Fox:  Ancelin and Kallixstus have already begun a ‘naughty and nice’ list for Christmas.  The Rabbit:  Think they’ll fight over who gets stuck with the ‘nice’ part of the list? The Fox:  They’d better, or it won’t be as much fun for us.  [Shrugs] Guess we’ll have to wait and see. The Rabbit: [nods and hops off the chair and toward the cabinets] Think we have any Wawa pretzels stashed away somewhere? The Fox:  That you haven’t eaten yet?  No. The Rabbit: Damn… The Fox: [heads for the living room] Let me just Google the nearest one, and we’ll make a run. The Rabbit: [skips out behind the Fox] Yay!     ~ BACK~ All content contained on this site is (C) 2001-2008 by Bounce and Angsty-os (all rights reserved) Please do not take, steal, link or borrow anything on this site without written permission from Bounce (Bunny Writer - Resin Fox)